I had actually written this blog without realising what the date was today. Sorry to all those celebrating love and romance with your cute stuffed bears and boxes of chocolates proudly positioned on your desks right now, this blog uses rather miserable analogies!
For the Valentines haters however who are spending the day cutting the heads off of roses that they brought for themselves and sticking large pins in their latest doll, this article may help you with that too.
Either way, remember this is a post on health and fitness and not on relationships!
I read an article in the newspaper the other day that claimed that a whopping 28,000 people in the UK were divorced on ground of adultery. (Told you it was going to be cheery!).
A Psychology professor in Montreal even went to the extreme of suggesting that during the course of a relationship 40-76% of couples cheat.
What does this have to do with health and fitness?
Well as a fitness professional I get the chance to observe exactly how people work when it comes to diet, fitness and motivation. Having had a little think about the above findings on adultery I began thinking how a new relationship is much like our first steps into a fit and healthy new us.
You don’t need to be married or in a relationship to think about this, but think about when you first met the boy/girl of your dreams. It pretty much goes like this:
- You wanted to see them ALL the time
- You constantly think about each other which ofcourse means sending a text every nanosecond. Beep beep.
- You introduce them to your friends, and they become part of your friend’s lives.
- Everything is EXCITING. Bowling with a load of teenage hoodies…EXCITING. Dancing in a sweat filled club…EXCITING. Feeding ducks at the park…EXCITING.
You get the idea…
‘I just lovvvveeee sitting on a wall…EXCITING!’
Now think about when you last set yourself your latest fitness kick. Perhaps it was January the 1st? Let’s see how it compares:
- You were ‘on it like Sonic’ you were dedicated to the cause ALL the time.
- All that went through your mind was when you could next exercise, what your next meal would be, you may have even set reminders on your phone to go off every nanosecond to keep you on track. Beep beep.
- Your healthy new lifestyle comes with you everywhere, you introduce it to your friends and you become known as ‘the health freak’ every time you go out to dinner.
- Everything is EXCITING. Cooking plain chicken breasts…EXCITING. Mega dosing fish oil…EXCITING. Getting up early to do your cardio for the day…EXCITING.
Pretty similar, right? I am sure we have all felt like this right?
Where did my relationship/new fit life go?
Everybody knows that after the ‘honeymoon period’ things change. Some couples still keep it going, but things do certainly change from your first few weeks/months together. Things such as love, dedication and commitment all begin to come up and you begin to really know and understand the person that you are with.
Many people will agree, that this is actually the best place to be.
So why would people cheat or get involved in adultery if this is how it’s meant to be. Well I did a very jolly Google search earlier as to why people cheat in relationships. I came up with the following:
- Something Is Missing
- The passion Has Faded
- Loneliness
- People Find Someone Who Treats Them Better
- Boredom
There is no denying that ‘health kicks’ also have a honeymoon period. You only need to head to a commercial gym now and compare it’s visitors to the first week of January. People have given up, they have CHEATED on their diet and their new healthy life. Why have they done this though:
- Something is missing – They miss the old, sugar laden foods that caused them to get fat, sick and tired, but they just didn’t stick it long enough to lose the addictions. Remember that cravings can also be a sign of a vitamin/mineral deficiency.
- The passion has faded – They may have got a program designed, they may have devised their own. However they became disappointed by the fact that the mirror/scale/anatomical measurements were not changing despite their best efforts.
- Loneliness – Only being able to eat salad and drink water can be a lonely place for anyone, especially if your friends and family haven’t followed suit with your new healthy lifestyle.
- People find someone who treats them better – Carbohydrates and trans fats sure do give you that comforting effect.
- Boredom – THE BIGGEST REASON. 90% of people are training the wrong way for the results they desire. This is why they are not getting the results they deserve. What’s more is that most current programs my clients bring to me on a first meeting consist of: 30 minutes on a rower, 30 minutes on a treadmill, 20 minutes on a treadmill. This terrible waste of time combined with eating the same thing every meal because you can’t be bothered to try new things leads to failure.
You see adultery in relationships is just like adultery to a new fit and healthy you.
Both ultimately affect trust, optimism for future success and in the short term ruin the one thing you desperately wanted at one stage.
Follow my tips to spice up your relationship with the new and healthy you this Valentines Day:
- Commit to your plan through thick and thin.
- Don’t avoid social events because you are looking after yourself. Learn to navigate menu’s when eating out and learn to ignore people baiting your efforts.
- Find ways of igniting the passion to your regime. Work with a coach who can build you a periodised program to success, building upon your strengths and weaknesses with new things every new phase.
- Change the way you do things, not just in movement and activity, but in the way you cook. Try foods from different cultures, try new marinades and rotate your foods weekly to avoid boredom.
And most of all. Just like with our relationships, when things get tough, talk to someone/eachother. Focus on finding a solution rather than just giving up on all the hard work you have put into the venture.
Happy Valentines Day :- )
Scott Marsh
Personal Trainer Beaconsfield
